Work Computer Secrets

I work in IT.  It’s amazing what people will do on their computers and write in their emails, despite having to sign a waiver that “All computer activity at work is monitored and recorded.”

I have half of the company’s banking, social media and personal email account info and passwords. I know who is secretly banging who at the office, behind their spouse’s backs. I know who is cybering at work and jerking it in the bathroom, almost daily. At least they tell their sex-chat partner they’re running off to the bathroom to jerk it, haven’t felt the need to check the validity of that one. I know when people are having marital problems, financial problems, I even know one person here had their children taken away because a social worker found cocaine in their house. I know who is embezzling money, I know when people get fired for completely bullshit reasons (like they just want to replace them with someone younger and nicer on the eyes,) and I know who my boss is buying xanax and vicodin from.

Basically, I have a treasure trove of my coworker’s secrets. I won’t actively do anything with this info, but it’s nice knowing I have the ammunition there if something were to ever happen.