Rude Hotel Guest

I worked at a hotel several years ago and had to deal with insufferable pricks about a dozen times a day.

The best/most evil revenge I ever got was on a guy that stayed with us four days a week for the entire five years I worked at the hotel. The big utility company in our area was having financial issues and he was the leader of the auditing team that was sent in to straighten it out.

I would interact with the guy at least a few times every day I worked, and he was ALWAYS very rude and condescending. As an example, one of his co-workers would ask me for a local restaurant recommendation and he would chime in with “Yeah, because minimum-wage workers are known for their taste in fine dining.” If someone asked me something personal, he would say something like “Ask him what life choices he made to be here plunging toilets and writing down my preferred wake-up call time. Maybe he can share his wisdom so we all avoid his fate.” Stuff like that. He was just a jackass to everyone on the hotel staff, and was always very demanding.

Since I saw him every day, I noticed that he had developed a relationship with one of the younger women on his auditing team. I saw their romance blossom from flirting to full-on groping and grinding in the hotel lobby. One day he had just finished delivering one of his delightfully shitty bon mots to me, and I was fuming. Then he screamed at one of my co-workers because she had a Filipino accent and he said he only wanted his room cleaned by “white Americans.” I vowed revenge.

His wife called in to speak to him later that night, like she usually did, and I said “Oh, I think he’s sleeping in Ms. *****’s room tonight. One moment, please.” and then I connected his wife to her room. His wife must not have told him what I had said, because he didn’t try to get me fired.

They got a divorce. They didn’t have kids, but according to another guy on the auditing team, his wife got the house and custody of their dog. He stopped staying with us shortly after “the phone call.”